Contemplative

Last night Lylia woke up several times with a high fever and sore tummy. Justin and I went to bed late watching Project Runway, and well I wish we hadn't. lol. I am so tired, and maybe that is why I am contemplative today. I am taking things a bit slower today that I usually do. Usually on the days I work from 11 am to 8 pm I try and get as much laundry done, cleaning done and grocery shopping done that I can because I don't have time any other day. But this morning we all slept in as long as we could since being sleep deprived most of the night. Then we sat had breakfast and snuggled. I am not sure why it meant so much to me this morning more than any other morning, but it is nice to not have to worry about the other stuff just because my sick baby meant more to me. My sister has been very sick with a very sick little baby, and while driving to work this morning, I couldn't help but think of her. Last summer my sister moved to South Carolina, and today I miss her more than ever. I remember hugging her and saying good bye not sure when I'd see her again. My hope was to move back east and we could see each other at holiday's and have weekend trips together, and maybe that might happen this year! I love my family. I love my mom and my sister. I really wish we all could live close together, because with each passing day I miss home more and more. In looking at mortuary schools people ask us why we want to go back east, and I can't help but be selfish and say it is because I miss home. I have missed home ever since I left. I never thought I would simply for the fact I am independent by nature. But there is nothing better than quilt days with mom, and play days with Jennifer, and car trips with Bryan. I miss my family. My grandpa is a tender topic to me, and whenever I think of him I feel him drawing me closer to my family. I thank him for that. I have this Genealogy book I was reading for a class one time when we went to go visit he and grandmother, and he picked it up and began to read it, and started asking me questions about genealogy. I sat down and we chatted about genealogy, and I was surprised he was asking me all of the questions, because I felt like he was more of the professional than I was. My grandpa and I had genealogy in common, and I guess that is why I so badly wanted to be a Genealogist. I wanted Grandpa and I to have that special connection. And I really think we do. When I work on my genealogy or go to the temple, I always feel him so close. I know it sounds weird to say, but I know he is my guardian angel sometimes.
I am thankful for sleepless nights so then I take life a little bit slower the day after, so then I can have more contemplative moments. A sweet tender mercy!